Sunday, June 18, 2006

Happy Father's Day!

I'm feeling a little melancholy today as I celebrate father's day with my children and my husband. I'm filled to the brim with love and proud that I married a man that is so good to me and to our children. I love the creativity that the children have shown and their desire even now as 2 are young adults to pay homage to the man they call dad. This is the first year that all 4 kids were not able to be here on Father's day together as Jackie is still in Richmond and Shaun will be out of town on father's day so he celebrated the day one day early. Nickie and Brandon made cards and hugged and loved on their dad today. While Jackie will be celebrating the day on Wed. So Bob really is lucky to have 3 father's days this year.

However, while I have so many things to be thankful for I'm missing my father very much. In October it will be nine years since his death and on days like today and his birthday and Christmas I really feel his absence. I think of all that I miss out on now that he is gone, all that my children miss. Brandon misses the most since he never met his Abuelo. I know how much my dad would have loved to have known his youngest grandchild.

I never had the luxury of knowing any of my grandparents as they all lived in Cuba. I never knew I was truly missing out on anything till I had my children and saw for myself what it is supposed to be like. Each generation has something to learn from and teach to the other generation. I'm sorry that I wasn't able to be a part of that as a child. I never had grandparents to spoil me then send me home to my parents. Perhaps that is a good thing as anyone that knows me will tell you I was a spoiled child sans grandparents! I suppose that could be for any number of reasons... 1. My parents felt they had to make up for lack of grandparents to spoil me.... 2. They just wanted to do and give me all they could... 3. Making up for lack of siblings...and I'm sure I could go on here but I won't.

My point is simply this, I miss my dad very much on this father's day. I want to believe that dad has been watching over me and knows that I haven't forgotten him and how much I wish he were here today so I could give him a huge hug and kiss and give him a card with the words that I can't seem to come up with to express how much I love and appreciate him.

To all the father's have a happy father's day and count your blessings! To all the kids don't forget your dad today, I know sometimes its hard to tell him how you feel but trust me you want to let him know how much you love and need him now before it is too late. I'm not sure my dad knew how much I loved him and for this I'm very sorry.