Saturday, July 09, 2005

a letter to my son

Shaun,

Today in spite of my wanting you to remain a boy you are officially a man. Legal age. I’m still in shock that 21 years have flown by so quickly for me. I know it doesn’t feel that way to you. I remember how long it seemed to get to 16 then 18, 21 got lost along the way cause by then I had you a 2 year old baby. I didn’t know what I was doing most of the time but all in all I guess I didn’t do so bad, after all you turned out to be a wonderful young man.

I know we have had our moments like when you were about 13 and slammed your bedroom door in my face and then returned home to find your door off the hinges. Yeah-classic Roseanne stuff. Despite times like that I have always been proud of the boy you were and the man you have become. The moments fleeting, as they are when you do something nice for Jackie fills my eyes with tears. I know you love her and yeah I know she can be a pain just as you could be. When you spend time with Brandon you light up his life like no one else can. This is also true of Nickie who loves you so much.

I’m proud of the hard worker you are and of the fact you intend to go back to school so you won’t have to do the same hard work your Dad has had to do his whole life. I know you will make it through school fine once you get back to it. I’m also proud of the choice you made in Alexis. I know you probably don’t think so and yes I admit I didn’t think so at first but I do now. Its just no one will ever be good enough for my number one son or so I thought. I hope things work out for you two the way you have hoped and dreamed.

Its been an honor to be your Mom and with tears in my eyes I write these words to you because I want you to always remember that you are always my baby boy and that I love you with all my heart. Don’t forget your old Mom, OK? Never forget that you can come to me with anything. I may not always have the answers or the answer you want or the money to fix the problem but I always have the love in my heart, even when you don’t think it is true. Tell me who is it you call when you need someone to fight for you? Its me, you know it. I will always be there. Happy Birthday!

I love you Shaun,

Mom